You know how sometimes you can just look at someone and tell what his name is?  Like, that guy is a Walter.  That guy’s a f*cking Walter and I want nothing to do with him.  Well, there may be something to that.  According to a new study,

the more unusual a boy’s name is, the greater the likelihood he will commit crimes in adolescence.

The study found that Michaels and Davids were cool, but “for names such as Alec, Ernest, Ivan, Kareem, and Malcolm” there would be nothing but trouble…   Continue »

It was bad enough Pete Wentz shared with us about him finding new ways to have sex with his wife Ashlee Simpson until her post-baby body is good and ready (i.e., butt sex), but now the Fall Out Turd is sharing TMI yet again.

He recently admitted to having tasted her breast milk, describing it as “soury” and “weird.” Also certain to taste “soury” and “weird,” Pete’s undoubtedly extra chunky, extra salty love juice, but you don’t hear Ashlee sharing the horrid details with us, now do you?

Yeah, that’s ’cause none of us need a mental picture of what his cottage cheese is like. Next time, keep that to yourself. You’re baby will thank you when it’s older.

Here is Fall Out Turd’s Pete Wentz and his nasty nose hairs t the Nokia Theatre in Times Square to promote their new album ‘Folie à Deux’ yesterday.

Source, SplashNews

More pics of Pete’s nose hairs, if you dare….. Continue »

Celebrities really ought to learn how to keep their sex stories to themselves, especially if their names starts with Pete and ends with Wentz.

While on Howard Stern’s radio show earlier today, Pete Wentz said of his sex life with wife Ashlee Simpson, “We have an amazing sex life.” He added, ”We have such sexual chemistry, if we had been on this show last year, we’d probably be doing it in the green room right now.” 

But with Asshole just recently having given birth two weeks ago, they’ve had to look for alternative routes of pleasure.  ”We do other fun stuff. She’s not ready down there.” (That’s code for he likes putting his strap-on in her butt.) 

Ashlee strikes me as the type of girl who could be easily convinced to take a load to the face, but she’d be saying “Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew EWWWW” the entire effing time, so while normally the idea of butt sex might make my nipples all hard with excitement, I can’t quite say now is one of those time.  

Nothing is as unattractive as the idea of someone trying to be sexy.  It’s like watching a puppy watch porn. Unnatural and unnecessary.

Source

Pics of Ashlee Simpson and her post-baby boobs en route to see Fall Out Boy perform live Dec. 8. after the jump! Continue »

Ashlee Simpson and Douchebag McGee dined at La Loggia Italian Bistro in Studio City earlier this week.

Her breastesses have come in quite nicely.  Although, when someone’s personality is annoying and as flat as Ashlee’s even big breasts aren’t enough to spawn interest.

A knocked-up Ashlee Simpson was photographed parading her pregger boobs in Hollywood yesterday.  The beautiful thing about the Internet is that you don’t have to hear the celebrities talking, you can just stare at their breasts as they bounce.  Correct me if I’m wrong, but are those nipple shadows I see?

To be honest pregnancy boobs scare me.  When I was a 8-year-old little girl my mom asked me to take food to a neighbor of ours who’d just given birth. The husband told me to just go in the room and drop it off.

Next thing I know I’m watching this baby suckling on a Yeti’s nipple.  That bitch’s breasts were so hairy if I’d had a shotgun I’d have shot her and phone The National Geographic to document the mythical creature’s existence.

More photos after the jump! Continue »

Check out these photos of sisters Jessica and Ashlee Simpson at the grand opening of Palms Place Hotel & Spa in Vegas over the weekend.

Yeesh.  Jessica has really taken her troubles with Tony Romo seriously.  Mildly put, she looks “bloated.” Put down the cookies, Jessica!

This is why alcohol is my best friend during when shit really hits the fan.  Food, what’s that?

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz confirmed what we already knew, he dumped his seed inside her and now there’s a hairy monkey growing in her womb. Outstanding!

Posted on the Friends Or Enemies website, the couple said, “While many have speculated about this, we wanted to wait until after the first trimester to officially confirm that we are expecting our first child. This is truly the most joyous time in our lives and we are excited to share the happy news and start our family.”

We’d be surprised except they’d posted a video back in February telling the whole world she was pregnant.

Papa Joe whored out Jessica Simpson yet again.

According to TMZ, People Magazine agreed to pay $1.4 million for photos of Ashlee Simpson’s wedding but only if Jessica and Tony Romo were there.  Hence, Tony showing up despite their split a mere days before.

I have yet to see the wedding photos, but I’ll bet my virginity Pete has got on more make up than Ashlee and Jessica combined.

Below, the knocked-up couple out and about in NYC over the weekend.

Not that anyone cares, but these two tools are now married.

The cutest part — they bought matching his and her clit stimulators.  Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Oh, and Tony Romo showed up after all.

Note: Photos are of a past Ashlee Simpson birthday bash, not the wedding.

Dwindling pop star Ashlee Simpson tempted us with some sweet cleavage while in the company of Pete Wentz earlier this week.

They look delish, but I think I’ll pass.  I don’t need to suck on anything that’s been sprinkled with Pete’s jizz.