God, you are so lazy!  The Vertical Bed, an apparatus that allows you to sleep upright on the go, has just been designed and tested.  You assemble it, affix it to a subway grate, put on your white noise headphones and opaque sunglasses, and you’re good to snooze.  Is this completely idiotic or do I want it very much?  It’s not at all clear.  No more getting winded on the walk home from Arby’s, America!

Sped-up video of a guy taking a 40-minute stand-nap in the middle of Manhattan.  No one pesters him or robs him, probably because in New York, when you see someone doing a weird art thing in the street, it is best to avoid eye contact.   Continue »

Skip to about halfway through the video, watch it, and don’t ever say I never did anything for you.

Are these guys speaking Russian?  I think they are, because in Soviet Russia… drinking has YOU problem!

Actually no, it works the same way over there as it does here.  But speaking of problems, has anyone been watching Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew?  Those people have a really problematic amount of sex!  They’re like, “It’s ruining my life, the fact that I have sex with so many women all the time.”  On the one hand, addiction is a very serious and traumatic psychological condition suffered by millions of Americans every day.  On the other hand, f*ck you, xtreme athlete who wears sunglasses inside and brings his damn surfboard to rehab.

Via VideoSift.

Fascinating study here from Ad Age that more or less confirms your predilections and prejudices about different beer brands.  A company called Mindset Media polled over 2,000 beer drinkers about their lifestyles.  Some of the data is not surprising (Bud Light is favored by “frat boys”!), but some of it validates more elusive stereotypes you sort of identified but never could quite articulate: “Corona drinkers are 91% more likely than average to buy recycled products and 38% more likely to own three or more flat-screen TVs.”  Corona, the beer of choice for the wealthy, kind, happy, thoughtful people you hate.

But what of Budweiser, Heineken, and craft beers?  After the jump.   Continue »

You may have seen this over the weekend, but if not, you should probably see this.  Although the Jude Law rendition was also quite fine in its own right.

You know, if Walken had done this on Leno or something, we’d sort of be at the point where, OK, Christopher Walken is caricaturing himself again and, boy, America just can’t get enough of the man speaking ridiculous words in his serious Christopher Walken voice.  But he avoids this (he always does, somehow) by performing it on an obscure BBC show instead.  And also because it is funny every time.

At sixteen stories, Royal Caribbean’s Oasis of the Seas is 50% bigger than the next-biggest cruise liner in the world.  ”A turf-covered chip and putt course, the world’s first open-air amphitheater, two surfing simulators, twenty-one swimming pools, and a zipwire.”  Also an indoor basketball court, a shopping mall, an “adults-only solarium,” and a carousel.  That’s what’s up.  This colossus can hold 6,000 passengers, runs 1,600 feet long, and cost $1.5 billion to construct.  We’re getting to the point when the question must be asked: at what size does it stop being “a ship” and start being “movable Jamaica”?

The Oasis left its shipyard in Finland today, on its way to Miami, its future port of departure.  Video of this giant seaborne wedding cake, plus the best amenity of all, after the jump.   Continue »

Their list of victims reads like a list of, uh, rich people in Hollywood: Lohan.  Hilton.  Fox.  Tisdale.  Bilson.  Patridge.  Bloom (Orlando, not Harold).  They also got Brian Austin Green.  Using information from celebrity gossip sites, a gang of ultra-chic teenage burglars terrorized Tinseltown for almost a year, nipping $2 million in jewelry from Paris Hilton alone.  Five 18-year-olds who broke into the houses of 10 celebrities, holy crap. SADLY, they have been brought to justice.

“They thought it was fun, kind of an adrenaline rush,” Los Angeles police officer Brett Goodkin said. “They would go in and steal the celebrity’s clothes and possessions, things they could never afford on their own.”

As Robin something (Robin Thicke?  I think it was Robin Thicke) used to say, “Steal from the rich and give to yourself.”  One of the accused atoned, ”I just learned my lesson that I need to make some better friends and some better decisions as far as my friends go.”  WRONG.  You already have the best friends possible who make the coolest decisions possible.  I love this story.  These kids are now trying to slough off responsibility for the crimes, but they should be on the rooftops, shouting YOU BET I STOLE $2 MILLION BECAUSE AUDRINA PATRIDGE COULD NOT FIGURE OUT HOW TO SAFEGUARD HER MANSION FROM A BAND OF WAYWARD CHILDREN.  But how will the burglars be charged?   Continue »

You are welcome to dislike this video of a foppish fellow spitting hot fire in the Queen’s perfect English.  It wouldn’t be hard.  White people covering extremely mainstream rap in a jokey, square way is pretty played-out, by and large.  But white people covering extremely mainstream rap in a jokey, square way accompanied by a banjo for little people?  Still a gimmick!  But all those things in the form of a man wearing a twirling mustache and smoking a pipe?  I mean, you can try to stay real in the face of so many delightful novelty hijinks piled one on top of the other here, but delightful novelty hijinks are like bees, in that you can groan and roll your eyes at one or two of them, but when a giant, seething, thundering wall of them topples you over, you can’t help but crack a smile.  Now pretend that analogy is logically correct and watch “Chap-Hop History,” a medley of rap by Mr. B, The Gentleman Rhymer, after the jump.   Continue »

What better way to capture the feeling of stalking solo through the inhuman wilderness armed with only a knife and your enervated Neanderthal instincts than through an electronic game that you play on your television, while sitting down in a chair made at a factory, eating food also made at a factory?  There is none; hence, Man vs. Wild, coming to an XBox 360 near you.  And it’s not just Bear Gryllis’s trials you can experience in this ultra-realistic way:

The Deadliest Catch video game is expected to hit shelves for Playstation 3, Nintendo Wii and Nintendo DS by spring 2010. The Man v. Wild video game will be available on those systems, as well as X-Box 360, but isn’t expected until toward the end of 2011.

Deadliest Catch utilizes the full extent of the Nintendo Wii’s unique full-body motion control system, I’m sure.  Cast the Wii Remote in a “crab net-throwing motion” to throw the crab net, and then maneuver it in a “retrieving a crab net from the water motion” to retrieve the crab net from the water.  You win the game by catching enough crabs to quit your job and move away from Alaska.  My favorite part of this story:   Continue »

Man, this is weird.  German arm wrestler Matthias Schlitte has two arms – fair enough.  But for his job (“professional arm wrestler”) Matthias Schlitte only really needs to use one arm.  So… he only uses one arm.  And the result is a rather staggering disparity between his arm sizes.  Video of the man in action, after the jump.   Continue »

“John Kanzius didn’t have a background in science or medicine.  He didn’t even have a college degree.  What he did have was a deadly form of leukemia.”  And he decided to do something about it.  Kanzius, using his expertise in the radio business, built a machine that essentially melts cancerous cells using radio waves.  It does not harm other cells in the body the way chemotherapy does.

In January of ‘08, Kanzius had gone through 36 rounds of chemo, was weak, sick, and close to death.  By summer of last year, he was playing 18 holes of golf a day.  Though Kanzius died earlier this year, millions of dollars have since been attached to his cancer project, which is being further developed in labs by guys who went to grad school for decades.

Via Gizmodo.