Revenge on Your Ex Using X-Rated Christmas Cards Is So Tacky

October 30th, 2009

By: Ben

The most egregious part of this story is not that 57-year-old David Simmons, of Murfreesboro, Tennessee, snapped pictures on the sly while doing sex acts with his ex-girlfriend. Nor is that he vengefully mailed said sex pictures to the family members of said ex-girlfriend as Christmas cards. Nor is it that he received a slap on the wrist “suspended sentence” for such an spiteful and emotionally damaging crime.

No, the most egregious part of this story is that HELL-OOOO, who sends CHRISTMAS CARDS in OCTOBER? What a gauche, classless man! Obviously the seasonally appropriate way to stick it to an ex-lover is to dress up for Halloween as someone who is better for not having you in my life, JENNIFER. Or to send a festive autumn cornucopia full of pumpkins, squashes, and sexual pictures of your ex-girlfriend to her family members.

Source: Metro.