Australian Sports Fans Face Strict 24-Beer Limit

The Australian government’s Ministry of Killing Everyone’s Buzz has decided to slap a super-weak limitation on drinking at the Bathurst 1000 three-day auto race in New South Wales.  Only 24 cans of beer allowed per day!  It’s like, I’m sorry, I thought this was a party, not a quiet dinner with my family.

The “one-slab” limit was first imposed in 2007, with police insisting drunken hooligans were tarnishing the reputation of the race and causing disruption in town.

Those choosing to drink lower-strength beer will be allowed to bring in 36 cans, police said.

However, there is a trick that may allow Australians to get around these transgressions against basic human freedoms…  

I speak, of course, of the old “empty out your beer cans (into your mouth) and fill them with tequila” trick.  Once you’re stoked on the garbage sauce, “dangerous alcohol-related violence” becomes merely a phrase in the air.  A phrase that you will want to inflict on as many of these crapface police officers as possible, with their… shirts and… their f*ckin’… radios.  Government trying to take away your rights.  The hell they will.

Meanwhile, British people continue to drink as many beers as they want, and you don’t see them going nuts with knifing and unsatisfactory sex.

Source: BBC.