Socialite Nearly Brings Down the House With Drunken Antics, Except the House Is a Plane

British socialite Clare Irby, 30, an heiress in the Guinness family, was arrested on charges of turning the first class cabin on a recent lengthy flight into a Sid Vicious hotel room adventure: crushing bottles of wine and mile-high-clubbing it in the seats while her naked toddler ran loose in the cabin.

“They were both loud, drinking. One passenger became concerned for the defendant’s son, who was two or three years old who at one stage was running around the aircraft naked.”

It’s like Trainspotting, on a plane (Planespotting?) – Lindsay Lohan can be offered the main role and turn it down for incomprehensible reasons, Christian Bale can play the paramour, and David Carlyle can more or less reprise his original role, except this time he’s a sociopathic air marshall who kicks whiny passengers out of the emergency exits.  Oh, another detail: the guy Irby was groping was onboard with his girlfriend, asleep in another seat.  She woke up, though…

Some great details here:

She wrongly claimed staff had lost a bag containing diamonds and demanded a bottle of wine in recompense, it was claimed.

When staff stopped serving Irby, who was estimated to have shared at least three bottles of wine with Melia [the guy], she ’showed the finger’ to one stewardess and called another a b*tch, the court heard.

She also allegedly threw a soiled nappy in an empty seat and left her son to run naked round the cabin, the court heard.

Later Irby pulled up her yellow skirt and revealed her black G-string in full view of other passengers to put on a pair of leggings.

When told the captain had decreed that they could not have any more drink, the pair allegedly shouted: ‘You can’t say no to us.’

And then Melia had a fight with his girlfriend after she woke up, because it was not reasonable of her to expect that he should not see other women while they were on a flight 11 hours long.

Source: The Daily Mail via The Frisky.