Tila Tequila vs. Shawne Merriman Assault Allegations – Who’s in the Wrong?

So as you probably heard, a story has been developing over the weekend that San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman choked and threw down his girlfriend, Tila Tequila, as she tried to leave his house.  Tequila then called a citizen’s arrest on Merriman and checked herself into a hospital, where she was “treated but not admitted.”  Merriman’s lawyers immediately attempted to clear his name, asserting that he was in fact trying to prevent Tequila from driving drunk.

‘Roid-raging Chris Brown-style terrorizing of a defenseless woman or crazy drunk chick trying to get revenge on boyfriend for imagined offense?  Examine the evidence, starting with pictures of the two getting down in the club, after the jump.  

So apparently these were taken at around 1 A.M. Everyone seems in hale and hearty spirit here, as one ought to be when getting one’s grind on.

At 3:45 A.M., Tila called the cops on Merriman.  His statement:

“I was taken into custody based upon that complaint. At the time, I was concerned about her welfare given the intoxicated state she appeared to be in and I encouraged her to stay until safe transportation could be provided. We would all do our best to help a friend if we considered their actions to be detrimental to their personal safety.

“I in no way caused any harm to Ms Nguyen, however, paramedics were called and she was examined but no injuries were reported. She was released and has since returned to Los Angeles, California. There have been no charges filed against me.”

Talk about Art of Writing a Statement Defending Against Domestic Assault 101.  That is a pretty well done statement.  Indeed, the police reported that Tila showed no signs of serious injury.  Tila’s attorney refused to make an official statement, because hey, whatever needs to be said can be said just as eloquently on Twitter.  She tweeted:

“I am allergic to alcohol. It has been publicly known for years. That is how I got the name Tila ‘Tequila’ cuz the irony. I can’t drink.”

And now we’re all scratching our heads trying to remember her show A Shot at Love – weren’t they drinking all the time?  Wasn’t that the point or something?  I just looked through some of the YouTube clips trying to get a totally breaking and exclusive gotcha clip of Tila boozing, but indeed, I could find none.  If you have a smoking gun clip like that, do send it to me via the tip box or link it in the comments per favore.

Anyway, ONTD has a a screenshot of Tila’s tweets from earlier that evening, including one that says,

Dman Im drunk!!!!!! Im heading to the Chargers VS 49ers game right now!!!!!!! YAYYYYYY!!!!!!

So there’s that.  Probably what happened?  Tila Tequila got right slizzard, started acting out, and tried to drive home.  Shawne Merriman got wound up, got angry, and restrained and/or choked his girlfriend in an overly aggressive way.  No one gets to be the winner.