Madonna Sex Tape, Sex Voicemails, Sex Faxes Up For Auction

Oh dear.  Another ex-bodyguard ex-lover of an ex-famous person has decided to profit on the embarrassments of the past.  This time around we have Jim Albright, bodyguard and benefit-friend to Madonna from 1992-94.  His inventory of Madonna sex memorabilia includes 2 microcassettes of voicemails (“answering machine messages”), 21 “saucy faxed letters,” and a 15-minute sex tape entitled “Snake Eyes Wife Swap Footage,” all of which he’s auctioning off.

If you’ll recall the early ’90s, sex faxing, or “saxing,” as the media christened it, was considered a serious problem among teenagers, many of whom used their fax machines to send explicit pictures to one another, only to see those private pictures faxed out to all the recipient’s friends.

Madonna’s sex VHS, however, is the real worry for her, considering it shows…  

…her flashing her boobs while appearing to snort cocaine and inhale nitrous oxide.

And then she lets co-star James Russo [of 1993's Dangerous Game] snort cocaine off her body.

Who knew Madonna was into whippets?  What an ace gal.

Also:

In one fax, Madonna writes: “Just watched the HBO special. It was OK. My booty looked good and you should see how good it looks in person. It looks Bootyful!”

Her saucy faxed letters to Jim – in which Madge signs off as “Lil’ Booty” and Lola Montez (a reference to the mistress of King Ludwig I of Bavaria) – are embarrassing enough.

She’s obviously way PMS about all this because she’s like 50 now and some poor old loser is trying to make a few bucks off her so he can go to a bar alone and slur at the bartender about the time he f*cked Madonna.  However, bidding starts at $38,000 for everything combined.  Madonna herself could just snap it up for $70K and she wouldn’t even hear that money go missing.

Source: The Mirror.