Get This: Soap Knuckles, the Soap for Hitting People

June 1st, 2009

By: Ben

Introducing a new soap from L’Oreal Prisonne: the Soap Knuckles, a glycerin soap cast from real brass knuckles! The description, from the website of the designer, SPYE (stands for “Subversively Playful Young Eccentric.” Weak.):

Slip on a pair of our Soap knuckles and hurt some dirt. Casted from genuine brass knuckles this all natural glycerin soap is designed to add a bit of playful subversion to your soap dish. A great gift for the street tough germaphobe or hygienic hipster.

Or a small man in a large prison! Here are some other ideas I have for prison hygiene products along the lines of “soap you can punch someone with” that SPYE can use, free of charge:

1. Soap that you can stab someone with.

2. Soap that is actually heroin.

3. A stick of deodorant that can fit into the anus of your new cellmate who needs to learn what respect feels like. (They may already make this.)

4. A razor that can shave someone’s ears off.

5. Soap that understands you did not kill that woman.