Douchebag of the Day

Hooker enthusiast Charlie Sheen and his third soon-to-be ex-wife Brooke Mueller wrote their own vows at their wedding.  Aw.

The groom kicked it off with promises to “organize less and listen more,” “quit breaking a hug too soon,” and “mute the ball game when Brooke says, this is a matter of life and death,” among others.

The bride followed, pledging to “cook more meals outside of the microwave,” “keep the pile of debris on my side of the bed below the two foot mark,” and “clean my closet at least once per decade.”

Both closed their vows with “this and that, such and such. Yada, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah.”

Yada, yada, yada?!  Blah, blah, blah?! Charlie just blatantly admitted he’s never going to stop screwing hookers in the ass in front of everyone at his wedding!

We all know what yada yada means.  It means, ‘Bitch, I’m going to do whatever I want and I’m never going to tell you about it!’ Like that time I yada yada’ed through the fact that I had anal sex with this hot Colombian dude while my an ex-boyfriend of mine was on vacation.  What can I say, Colombian men are sooo sexy.

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