Michael Jackson died and that means every news station in every city all around the world just HAS to cover it.  Apart of that expanded coverage is making it a local story and relating it to a time when Michael Jackson was around.  In this video, a local Las Vegas reporter is trying to talk about how Michael Jackson had performed in the area, but we’ll never know exactly where he was going with it because that dude in the black shirt starts to sass him because he is a local fan REACTING.  Anyways, what the local fan gets is a reaction from the reporter.

Check out the video after the jump>>> Continue »

This is one of those sketches that you ask yourself why you’re watching it half way through and just when you are about to close the window BAM!  The big payoff hits.  I suppose some people might not find this funny, but I am not one of them.  Plus, I like a big bang in the end…if you know what I mean.

Check the video out, and sorry if the song gets stuck in your head, cause it’s totally in mine>>> Continue »

Here’s a video that will gladden your heart today.  Nickelback, perhaps the least-liked band group of four people in the world today, is playing as part of some kind of rock festival in Portugal.  Then someone throws a rock at them…   Continue »

A new horror film is coming out and it is beloved by independent film critics in glasses because… it is f*cked up in a smart way?  Imaginatively disgusting?  Something like that.

The film is called Deadgirl.  It is about two guys (not a misleading title, wait) who are losers in high school.  They like to hang out at an abandoned mental institution and break things for fun, but when they go into the basement, they find a dead body.  A totally hot dead girl body!

Ultimately the trailer leads me to believe they do the Wrong Thing and thus the horror part is brought upon them.  Trailer and more way gross details, ATJump.   Continue »

Jessica Simpson Big Boobs And Golf (The Grumpiest)

A little something for the ladies (Celebslam)

Usher: “Am I Really My Baby’s Daddy?” (Bossip)

Adriana Lima’s Italian TV Spot (Lossip)

Sextra: Top 10 Kama Sutra Positions Part: 1 (Hip Hop Wired)

Katie Price’s Non-Existant Ass in her Short Shorts of the Day (Drunken Stepfather)

Hitler Finds Out Michael Jackson Is Dead (Celebrity Odor)

Teacher sends out sex tape DVD by mistake (Totally Crap)

Whoose Celebrity Sideboob? 3 (Liquid Generation)

Hayden Panettiere – LA Candids (UseMyComputer)

Peer Pressure: The 5 Best Torrent Search Sites (Complex)

Cocktail of the Week: Apple Pie Shot (For Ladies by Ladies)

Veronika Fasterová.

 Just your average girl ready to get down and dirty.

Scope out the goods in 3…2…1… Continue »

What’s new with Amy Winehouse?  Well, she’s still alive, and she’s still enjoying her magical island rehab where she gets to be cured of drugs by drinking all the time.

Sadly, on this most festive and pool-party-y of weekends, Amy Winehouse has been banned from her hotel pool.

“She’s regularly drinking large quantities of wine and rum and no one in her condition should be going anywhere near water.”

Yo, if Amy Winehouse swallowed a little chlorine water on accident, it would be the healthiest thing that’s happened to her all year.   Continue »

Here is a list of things that aren’t American: 1) being a weirdo.

I kid of course – that isn’t a list.  It’s only one thing.  Yet no one knows how to get weird like the Japanese, and presumably that is why they have popularized the “bagelhead” phenomenon.  Here’s how it works: you take your head.  Then you go over to a body modification store.  Then you put needles into your face.  The needles will dispense a formula of saline into said face, possibly in an unusual pattern.  Finally, you will have a tumor-like growth.  On your face.  You will be considered cool.

“Things like suspensions are really quick. But saline infusion is a gradual process and you become a freak progressively. That’s the joy of it,” he explains. “You can enjoy watching it by having a few drinks and gradually seeing a transformation, but if you’re looking all the time, you can’t see the difference. If you meander off and come back, it’s a real surprise.”

A REAL BAD SURPRISE.  More pictures of gross-looking people, ATJ: Continue »

The 4th (tomorrow!) is kind of a beer holiday, and I wanted to bring you a red-white-and-blue beer recipe today, but the issue is, that doesn’t exist.  Because you do have, independently, red beer and white beer, but of course strictly speaking both those beers are brown and… look, how about RWB sangria?  If you throw on some Springsteen, nobody’s going to question your allegiance to big beautiful America.  And also, novelty drinks are as American as Mel Gibson.  ATJ, recipes for a festively patriotic set of sangrias…   Continue »

Remember that joke from like 3 weeks ago?  ”Knock knock.”  ”Who’s there?”  ”Swine flu!”  And then it wasn’t funny because the swine flu epidemic had ended and also because it’s a sh*tty joke?  Well, at least one of those things is no longer true.  The joke is hilarious now because

A teenager in London has become the fourth person in Britain to die after contracting swine flu, it has emerged.

The 19-year-old man from south London, had ’serious’ underlying health problems and it was confirmed after he had died that he had contracted swine flu.

The latest death comes after ministers warned there will be 100,000 new cases of swine flu per day by the end of next month.

100,000 new cases?  I don’t think you understand, swine flu.  The media is over you.  And yet – it was the internet that caused this health crisis and the internet that’ll get us out of it… Continue »