Let me preface this by saying that I’m Lady GaGa’s straightest fan, and I wish her nothing but the most complimentary bottles of red wine and the most glamorous inhalants eBay can buy.  But even we ridest and dyest of fans have our, “ugh ok Lady GaGa” moments.  The whole “I’m bisexual too!” thing was taxing.  I was pretty eh on the sparkler bra gag as well.  It felt like it had been done before, and I don’t care whether it Has Been Done or merely Should Have Been Done, Lady GaGa’s appeal is that she Does Otherwise Than That.

The new Fame Monster, leaked over the weekend a week in advance of its release (download it via here or here, the “DepositFiles” host site works, after you wait for the ad to time out: look I am all supportive of artists and their intellectual rights especially if those artists are Lady GaGa, but seriously one of this woman’s three-ring costumes could feed f*cking Azerbaijan, and Azerbaijan does not even have that low a standard of living), is larded with the fresh GaGa, but you get scoops of the trite GaGa as well.  The bad and the good, after the jump.   Continue »

Brief FListed hiatus guys.  Sorry!  What is the meaning of this?  What is the meaning of anything?  I don’t know.  I don’t have answers, just this hilarious compilation of Roger Sterling zingers.  They’re great because a lot of them aren’t even that witty.  He just delivers them like, “I just crushed you with the most confident insult ever,” and you know what, I’m sold every time.  ”Well I know where you’d be!”  Good one?  Good one.

Anyway, new content coming soon, this paper isn’t getting itself, etc. etc.

Laura Siani, sometime Maxim Hometown Hottie and, well… I mean what else is there to say?   Continue »

…I figured you might want to know that d*cktowel.com is now live.  My roommate Dan who also works for the internet looked up the URL last night during the show.  There was no site (“Did you mean ‘d*cktrowel.com’?”), but he checked again today, and whoa, so many MS Paint penises!  Includes a bonus video from the Always Sunny dudes.  ”A girl with the towel on works too.”

As the site exhorts, “Join D*ck Towel Nation!”  It appears you can actually order as well.

Nothing about this is safe for work: d*cktowel.com.

FListed friends Heeb Magazine are hosting a big Jew party on Christmas Eve, “Heebonism,” in a bunch of major U.S. cities.  It was featured on the Travel Channel’s Extreme Wild Parties, so there’s that.  Vid above, tickets at Heeb.

Jennifer Lopez Sex Tape Details. (Bossip)

Meryl’s Middle-Aged Threesome Party. (FilmDrunk)

Paz de la Huerta Naked in Some Movie Called “The Limits of Control” of the Day. (Drunken Stepfather)

Christina Hendricks Looking Great as Usual. (DRW)

Alessandra Ambrosio Beach Photoshoot in St Barths. (Totally Crap)

Bar Refaeli – MTV 2009 EMA – HQ Pictures. (UseMyComputer)

Girl Gallery: Amerie. (Complex)

Lamar Odom Says He Wants To Start A Family “Right Away” With Khloe. (I’m Not Obsessed)

Where In The World Is Jenn Brown? Catch The Future Erin Andrews Tomorrow On CBS Strikeforce. (Busted Coverage)

The Saddest Handjob in America, Louis C.K. Stand-Up. (Uncoached)

Hire a Real Thug on Craigslist. (Guyism)

Most Infamous Celebrity Interviews. (PopEater)

Boob Warmers? (The Frisky)

Ah, the British.  Give Britain’s millions of wayward youths (chavs, wankers, you know the ones) credit for doing their darnedest to erase the international Anglo image of expensive hats, peerages, and porcelain clocks.  In ten years, when we think “U.K.” it’ll be casual sex, knife fights, and reckless drinking.  This story more or less summarizes the story of Future Britain: Miss England, Rachel Christie, attacked Miss Manchester, Sara Beverley Jones, in the wee hours at a nightclub.

Miss England has relinquished her crown.  The fight was over a man.  His name is “Tornado,” and he is the British equivalent of an American Gladiator.  More details, ATJ: Continue »

Tonight at 10 (British o’clock) on Sky 1, professional chatter with the dead Derek Acorah is going to hit Michael Jackson up on his Heaven Nextel!  ”Michael Jackson: The Live Seance” will be held “on an island … in a secret location familiar to Jackson.”

“We have chosen genuine Michael Jackson fans and people who knew him throughout his life to take part in this event,” Howell added. “Derek will also have a personal item from Michael Jackson, and will invite everyone to sit quietly and channel positive thoughts … he can’t force Michael to appear, but he will try inviting his spirit by creating welcoming environment.”

How much do you bet Michael Jackson appears?  I bet a million dollars that he does!  ”The spirit seems to be making a punching motion.  Does anyone in the audience have a deceased friend or family member or favorite pop music performer who might find a “hit it” or “whack it” motion significant?  Perhaps something to do with a beloved pet or childhood toy or number-one-charting 1982 single?… OK, look, it’s f*cking Michael Jackson, and he says, uh, thanks for liking my songs and, uh, don’t forget to feed my chimpanzee.”

MTV via Idolator.

Today: Nayomi Rene, out of California.   Continue »

God, you are so lazy!  The Vertical Bed, an apparatus that allows you to sleep upright on the go, has just been designed and tested.  You assemble it, affix it to a subway grate, put on your white noise headphones and opaque sunglasses, and you’re good to snooze.  Is this completely idiotic or do I want it very much?  It’s not at all clear.  No more getting winded on the walk home from Arby’s, America!

Sped-up video of a guy taking a 40-minute stand-nap in the middle of Manhattan.  No one pesters him or robs him, probably because in New York, when you see someone doing a weird art thing in the street, it is best to avoid eye contact.   Continue »

A Small Collection of “After Party” Shots. (Uncoached)

*Bossip Exclusive*: One NBA Player is Cheating with Another NBA Player’s Pregnant Fiancée! (Bossip)

“This Is It” Soundtrack at Number One. (FilmDrunk)

Midnight T&A: Genevieve Godbout. (Celebslam)

Sex, Lies & Videotape: Celeb Porns We Never Got To See. (The Frisky)

Is Chris Brown Stealing Rihanna’s Thunder? (PopEater)

Miranda Kerr – November CS – HQ Pictures. (UseMyComputer)

So Much Beer… GONE! (Hail Mary Jane)

Megan Fox Rolling Stone Outtakes of the Day. (Drunken Stepfather)

2 Cakes, 1 Kelly Brook. (Celebrity Odor)

The 15 Best Stacy Keibler Videos of All Time. (Epic Carnival)

Hollywood Is Officially Out of Ideas. (Gunaxin)

3 All-Time Greatest Tim Tebow Halloween Costumes. (Busted Coverage)

12 Hottest Female Sports Uniforms. (Guyism)

Paris Hilton Denies Physical Fight With Doug Reinhardt. (Anything Hollywood)